Friends

Its sad that we have lesser friends as we grow up. Of coz I do know of people who still have lots of friends but I guess I lacked that kind of energy to maintain my own. When I was still active in IRC (quite many years ago), I was busy with so many friends and activities that I was seldom at home. My sister always said that my home is like a hotel to me!

As years passed by, I have grown tired of organising activities coz I am always the one to do so only. Many friends were then lost in touch along the way and I only managed to keep in touch with those closer ones until now.

I admit I am not someone who is so enthu about contacting everyone else all the time so whenever one side dun make an effort, our friendship will be like history. Seems like I am more of the kind who needs to get pushed so to those friends whom I have not made an effort to stay in contact, my sincere regret and apologies.

I feel especially disappointed when I tried to invite some old friends for my coming wedding but sad to hear that they cannot make it, either coz too busy or probably some other committmentts which are more important to them. I cun really blame them coz everyone got their own way of life but coz these people used to be quite close with me so I cun help but feeling disappointed.

Of coz there are friends whom without any doubts will make an effort to attend my wedding, saying that they will come even uninvited. Its heartwarming to hear that and really appreciate the gestures.

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I was looking back at some photo albums some time ago, done by me last time that brought back many nice memories. I even realised that I have unintentionally forgotten some of them ever since we lost touch or somehow just stopped contacting. Like people say, bad memories are always easier to remember, sad but true.

Its part and parcel of life for people to come and go. Some may stay forever, some crossed our paths for a while and some just slided through. I have been quite closed with some friends since my irc days and am glad that we are still good friends now.

Of coz some of them have drifted away from me at some point of time but I still treasure their friendship b4. There were also misunderstandings or incidents which pulled some friends apart and as time goes, its very difficult to get back the same kind of relationship.

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My sister was telling me one day, when she was using my computer and realised that I have so few contacts on my msn. I did not tell her that even though there are already so few, most of them are in fact not in contact anymore. Or rather, some were never online anyway. Even in my handphone phone directory, most of the contacts were people whom were no longer in contact. Did not want to clear these people off coz who knows, one fine day I may get a message or call from them and I wun be asking "who r u?".

Technology also helped us to make friends, and inevitably made us lose some along the way. I was using ICQ long time ago and eventually switched to using MSN Messenger. Then came Yahoo Messenger but I seldom use anyway. Most of my friends are on MSN now but as I have limited access sometimes (esp in office), the chances of using that to maintain friends are restricted too. When I moved from ICQ to MSN, I lost touch with alot of nice friends coz I wasn't able to access ICQ in office then. When MSN was improved to escape firewall restrictions, I eventually used it most of the time. Now MSN is probably too widely used that connections are sometimes unstable and worse, my office is going to block MSN soon.

Friendster and Mulitply became more popular as everyone can set up their own website to share pictures and even their blogs now. I wasn't active in Friendster all along but managed to still login once in a few months at least to browse through my friends' sites. I became quite active in Multiply only sometimes late last year until now. Sometimes the only way I can know how people are getting on are through their blogs and photos, how weird. People dun even talk much anymore, just let the websites do the talking.

I think we all need some real talking, but with technology growing, making communications easier than ever, more personal communications seemed to be drifting away. I am making an effort to at least meet up with some closer friends once in a while to catch up but its always so difficult to co-ordinate.

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Anyway to friends who are still reading this, thanks for being my friends and hope to keep these friendships going on forever.