Touched..

I was reading my cousin's blog earlier, and somehow it touched me. Tears almost flow out of my eyes.

She mentioned about granny touching her little fingers where she felt a sudden sense of love, no one has given her that kind of feeling before. If I am her at that point of time, I might or might not feel the same way as her. But as reading her blog, a sense of sadness overcome me.

We were not exactly very close to my grandma since young, mostly coz of communication problem. We started speaking mandarin since the govt encouraged us to do so in my kindergarten to primary school days. Since then, we find it harder and harder to speak to older folks, especially my grandparents.

Time passes very fast and we eventually grew up. Although my grandparents only live few doors away from us, we seldom go over unless on sundays when cousins and relatives come over. On special occasions like Chinese New Year, we would then be able to gather longer.

When my grandpa passed away in 2002, I feel kinda sad coz we did not visit him at all at the home he went to stay a few months before. He was getting very difficult to move around and my grandma has problem walking then so he had to be sent to the home. At least there is someone to take care of him there. We had wanted to visit but kept postponing the visits and eventually did not manage to until he passed away.
After that, I try to make an effort to go pray for him on special occasions.

Even after that, much as I try to communicate more to my grandma but its sorta difficult. As usual, we dun see her unless she sits downstairs with some other old folks chitchatting every night (when we happen to be home late). As I still cun speak hokkien, plus she has problem in hearing, I find it more difficult to talk to her.

Once I saw my grandma strolling near the old school, I feel so sad and helpless. I wished I could walk with her, hold her hand and talk to her but I cun do so. I din approach her that day, coz was actually rushing home to meet sis. I feel bad afterwards...but I dunno what else I could do.

Its so sad nowadays young people and old folks cun really communicate, or make an effort to. What will happen in future???

I hope I have an answer....

Bad Tuesday

As usual, returning back to work over a long weekend was tiring and blue. Not really feeling tired but more like dragging myself to work. Had wanted to take a cab coz was so lazy and lethargic but seeing a long q at the taxi stand, so 4get it. Bought breakfast and lunch from the confectionery and took MRT to work. Surprising the train wasn't so crowded and I managed to get a seat. (Later on in office heard that there were train faults from 8.30am to almost 9am, lucky I was early!).

It was a bad day to begin with coz I simply find no reason to be happy. I had intended to go buy cloth for the sashes Frankie wanted (he asked me for a favour to buy for him) so asked if Web wanted to go with me. He said he din want to go and I felt a bit disappointed. What a beginning! Had asked sis the night b4 but she said need to do her freelance. Later in the morning wanted to ask Xris but as she just returned from bringing her dad for an early doctor's appointment, and she was sounding so tired so din ask her too.

My boss had to make my day worse when she called me in to discuss some bo liao stuffs. I dunno why my face just cun smile after seeing her stupid face. The minute I hear her voice, I get agitated. I was telling my recept maybe I would quit after I get my increment letter. After that take a break and slowly find another job. Its been quite awhile since I take a long break (after about 7.5 years of working here).

My colleague even commented I got dark clouds over my face!! I really looked bad and tired I guess. I ate in during lunch and when my vendor came over, I was complaining to her how fed up I am with work and she also commented I looked tired.

Had a rather long meeting at 2.45pm with my boss and 2 other colleagues. I wasn't involved in the 1st place but my boss wants me to join in (waste time!). I din bring in my laptop this time coz I tot it wun take long. Who knows we were still stuck inside ard 4pm so I sneaked out to grab my laptop. It finally ended ard 4.45pm! Luckily my boss had wanted at 4pm but there was no rooms available and coz she always dragged the time, so better not risk so I changed it earlier. Else we wud still be stuck there by 6pm!! At least I am still alert and smart though feeling tired.

Left office at 5.35pm and took train to PS (Spotlight) to get my stuff and bought rice burgers (from MOS Burger) back home. Wanted to shop ard but think just din have the mood since I am alone and PS was so crowded!! When I reached the train platform, only managed to squeeze in the 3rd train (to Yishun) and got home in one piece (the train was damn crowded ard that time, which I hate most). Had a good dinner with part of the rice burger (shared with sis, the other one for my parents to share) and my fav luncheon meat with soup (Lotus root with potato and chicken) and some rice!! Well, at least the day is ending soon so hope tomorrow is a better day....

Angeline's & Yoki's Birthdays

Today happened to be both my fren (Angeline) and sis' fren's (Yoki) birthdays. Me and Xris took leave to have lunch with Angeline. She had free vouchers for the buffet lunch and had invited us so its not so nice to turn her down, especially when its her actual day.

The lunch wasn't exactly fantastic, coz probably all of us not that hungry and the spread was so-so, and extremely crowded with the executive lunch crowd. We got Angeline a surprise bouquet (I went all the way to Far East to buy under the hot sun!!) and a pendant from Lee Hwa.






We din took long to finish our meal from 1pm to around 2.30pm. Went to the ladies and took some picture there too!


After that, we headed on for some shopping before settling down for some drinks at Coffee Bean at Scotts SC. We took some mini polaroid and pictures and chatted till all of us almost fell zzz. Then its time to get up and continue some shopping again.




My sis was meeting her fren (the other birthday gal - Yoki, whom me and Xris also know her) at Orchard MRT stn so we headed to get some surprises for Yoki. Bought a "SHE" CD for her at CD Rama (and I also finally bought my "Liu Gen Hong"'s CD) and bought a small bouquet for her too. We passed it to her, wished her happy birthday and took a fast picture of her with the bouquet and we spilted our ways, agreeing to meet probably later. They were going for a movie (Final Destination 3) and we continued our shopping before Angeline left to meet her bf ard 7.30pm.




After that, we proceeded to have our dinner at the Food Republic at Wisma. I had my favourite Fried Dory Fish rice as usual and that Xris had Kimchi Ramen. After dinner, we went to Isetan Orchard and we actually bought almost $300 worth of Paul & Joe products in less than 1/2 hr!! We proceeded to Taka as Xris wanted to get her Clinque products as well. Too bad the free gift wasn't what she wanted (she saw it at Tangs). She still managed to spend about $180 just on Clinque products!!

We proceeded to walk slowly to meet my sis n Yoki and met Dixie (my ex-col) while walking along Lucky Plaza. While reaching Tangs, we were surprised that its still open (or rather its closing), we managed to quickly grab about $95 worth of Clinque products (I bought the pore refining serum and Xris got a whitening hand cream) and she finally got the free gifts she wanted.

Finally after abt 1hr plus of shopping, we met sis and Yoki at Starbucks Wheelock Place and settled down for some drinks and chit chat.




Stayed until ard 11pm+ and quickly left to catch the train back home. We were all exhausted after a whole day and regretted that it ended so fast! Its back to work again tomorrow...sigh~

Its another weekend...

So fast, its weekend again. But it passed so much faster than the weekdays (long draggy week of work).

Friday
As usual, met Web at Suntec and had intended to buy tickets for a concert on Sunday but he told me he had to be on standby thus maybe cun watch. I was feeling rather disappointed as I had waited abt a year for this and now cun watch :(. No choice lor..since he has to standby so just have to wait till next year. We then headed to Marina Sq again (no nid to think where to go) and had dinner at KFC after almost 1/2 hr of brain storming.

Walked to Esplanade after that coz the weather was quite cooling that night. We were lucky coz we managed to catch an outdoor band performance by some "Air Force Band" who is here for the Aerospace thing. They were a great band, consisting of 9 members and was very entertaining with their songs (from Jazz, Rock n Roll, Country music and Pop). It lasted merely 30 mins but it was enjoyable. This was so far the best outdoor performance we saw coz other times were either some Malay/ Indian music or tribe performances.

After standing for 30 mins, we decided to take a rest along the esplanade outdoor seats facing the Merlion. It was a cooling night as we chatted away until ard 11pm and started to head home.

Saturday
Cun think of anywhere to go so me and Web decided to go East Coast again. Went last week but unfortunately it rained quite heavily before we stayed more than 2 hrs. This time the weather was quite hot, cun find a decent shaded seat thus had to hang around until the sun goes down. Chatted till ard 7.30pm and we walked to Parkway Parade hawker centre for dinner. Shopping abit and finally took bus back to Orchard and changed to mrt home.

Sunday
Supposed to go to the "Chong Feng - Reunion 5" concert but as Web is on standby, we din wan to risk buying tickets. So as usual, met Web at AMK again for pool, then proceeded to swim at YCK. The pool wasn't so crowded so we managed to swim 10 laps. Din stay long coz planned to watch Liverpool's match at 8.30pm. Had dinner at A-Star while watching the match and we had some Tiger too. The day finally ended with Liverpool winning 1-0 and we headed home.

Punctuality - a good virtue

I was talking to my colleague this morning, and somehow the topic went to punctuality. I was telling her, when I travel to western countries, people are so punctual until you cannot believe it. They will do everything on time. No matter how relaxing their life is, compared to the fast-paced Singapore, they BOTHERED to be ON TIME!! This is truly admirable, which is seldom being practiced in Asian countries, especially Singapore. Most commonly seen is at wedding dinners. Even though the time on the invitation card says 7pm, most guests are only seated almost till 9pm and obviously dinner only starts after that. By then, punctual guests could almost see stars as they endure hunger for hrs (but I think nowadays people smart, they eat abit before they come, or even worse, they come late). Dinner is then rushed through as most restaurants and hotel kitchen closes ard 11pm. The staff needs to go home u know!! I guess people will not change, so just have to accept it.

I also have friends who are never on time. In fact, its almost everyone I know (except rare species like my sis - runs in the genes I guess, and my beau). I used to have this friend, whom I always have to wait for her at least 15 mins to 1/2hr on our dates. I dunno y I have this patience then. As I grow older, my patience is limited - I will probably leave and do my own stuff (shopping etc) until my date reach and call me.

Seriously I do not understand y people bother to buy clocks at home, watches to wear where no one is on time anymore. Socially, as far as I remembered, I have never been late (unless last min situations crop up). But for work, I used to be not so punctual. Its probably a mental thing - everyone is not on time, y shld I? No one is in the office by 8.30am anyway. However I have not been ridiculously late (at most 15 mins to 1/2 hr) so far. Luckily for me, when my sis started working and shared the same room with me, I had to wake up earlier so we both have enough time to bathe and get ready. Since then, I always reach office damn early but my sis din manage to coz she took too long to get herself ready every morning. I also realised that traffic is not so heavy and mrt not so packed b4 7.45am, which is usually the time I leave home. Suddenly I improved my working attitude and it definitely does help when my boss, colleagues and vendor commented on how early I reach the office and started working. Ever since then, I will get stressed up when I leave home later than 7.45am and always aimed to get to the office by 8.30am. I can do alot more work, n most importantly my sales updates are on time when I am early. By the time others stepped in, I would be able to relax abit! Isn't that great!

On the other hand, I have no problem with colleagues being late for ard that time but anytime later, I will get fed up. Not coz its my business, but its very difficult to answer to other colleagues asking for them when it should be time to be ard in office. Ok, so what if they stay late? We have stipulated working hrs, if no one is to follow n come as they want and leave as they want, everything will go haywire. And you know what, the worse thing is that the company probably might not care, your colleagues too. But...it affects YOU!! Your work attitude and your sincerity to your friends are affected. Bad habits are hard to change, thus if you move on to a new company, you might not be able to adjust your timing and your new employers and colleagues will have a very bad impression on you (apart from they are also late - that's their problems!) When that happens, people see u as their kind, and will not respect u to be anyone different.

Socially (on casual dates with frens etc), I am ok if someone is held up by work or anything urgent thus late for any appointments but at least let the poor chap who is waiting know (by sms or call). Its silly having to wait for someone whom u dunno what time he/she is going to turn up. At least within the waiting time, we can do more constructive activities (like going to the toilet, shopping ard or read some books etc) instead of sitting or standing there like an idiot.

Come on people, be punctual (its a good virtue to cultivate for your own well-being). If not for work (which I cun really blame coz some people are really stone in the mornings - but try to keep it to within 30 mins and then improve on it!), at least be punctual on social dates. Singapore is SO small, there is no such thing as too far or wat crap....

Stressed at work

For so many years, I have been enjoying my work (except the boss). Since I joined this company on 1 Oct 1998, I have been through so much and finally reached this stage I am at. Being on contract for about 3 years plus, I suffered quite alot initially. As a temp, I was pushed to every dept who needs admin support. I almost had a break down that time (was so stressed until I walked all the way from United Square to Bugis then to Raffles City one particular day). Luckily I had a saviour who understood my woes and managed to solve part of my problem (he actually took me out from his dept and employed a temp for his dept - I was supporting 4 depts at that time).

As time passes, I was lucky to be converted to permanent staff finally in Apr 2001, following a merger of my existing company with another company. Life was ok from then now, not so stressed and I even enjoyed coming to work everyday. But starting from somewhere Jul 2004, I was feeling sick of working here. I had difficult times with my boss. She is forever nagging and reprimanding people (including me and my poor colleague) and giving us so much unhappiness. I took several holidays then to destress and managed to hold on until today (ain't I marvellous!).

I am seriously looking for jobs now, even how much I like my current job. Its just time to move on, coz despite all the good benefits, colleagues, and how much I still enjoy my work, I simply cannot stand the boss anymore. She is finding fault with everything I do and its very very difficult to understand her moods (cannot go into details coz it will takes ages...).

About 7.5 years in this company, I think its enough. I hope I will find something soon, or at least have a chance to take a break else I think I will go mad anytime. I feel depressed everytime I stepped into this office and I dread coming to work.

Wish me luck...to find stress-free work soon, so I could live longer, healthier and happier...

Wake up to real love!!

Something inspired me to write this blog. Wanted to do it last nite (ard 1am) but obviously was too damn tired. My sis' fren (let's call her YK) broke off with her bf last week, n i jus heard they patched up last nite, on stupid terms. That stupid guy actually wanted YK to wait for him until Jun 06, so that he can play ard (flirt etc, dunno wat else, leave it to ur imagination) and then come back to her again in 4 mths' time. And the worse is YK actually agreed!! Is women in love always so stupid, dumb n silly??? As far as i rem, i m not so silly to this extent. Allowing your bf to ditch u for a couple of mths for him to flirt ard n wait for him to come back to u??? Get a life man...what kind of jerk is this? If such a guy cannot stay faithful to u, n even hv e cheek to quote such terms, GIVE HIM UP!!! He's definitely not worth it. Can u imagine him doing this to u when u get married?? Are u able to stand him being unfaithful?? Love is great but not to this silly stage.

We have feelings, so when we feel sad of coz we will cry. When u finally stopped crying, it will be all over. No point turning back for someone not worth it. Its jus a matter of time u will recover, so y make urself more miserable by prolonging the suffering? I m sure alot of us have been thru this, n we recover n hv a better life now.

I broke off wif my ex in 2003. He initiated it coz he said he prefers to stay single thru his life, n said din wan to burden me. Obviously i was devastated then. Luckily, i have my sis, my frens n my cols who tided me thru e hard times. It wasn't easy coz we had no major problems in our r/s but it still ended so suddenly. It took me a whole 1.5 yrs to recover, which i nv tot i wud at tt point of time. Its not easy, really but its possible to recover. Becoz we hv time to think thru it, we had different advices from people from their point of views, n of coz e support n encouragement from them. Its jus a hurting process, a period whereby u see things more clearly, know what u really wan n u become wiser. Of coz I still hv a phobia of r/s sometimes, but if u can find someone who truly love n care for u, u shld gv it a try. I m glad i did, n found my current beau, Web. He's not perfect but he's definitely better than my previous bfs, who obviously din know how to treasure me.

So y despair, if u do not find love now, u will eventually. At least find someone worth of u, not jus anyone who is almost near to a piece of shit.

So YK, I hope u will wake up to ur senses soon. That guy is definitely not e one for u, coz he did not treasure u in e 1st place. Y waste your youth on him when u cud hv someone better, no matter how long it takes for him to come along.

To my friend Xris, dun worry if love is not at ur doorstep now, its probably worth a long wait for someone better. We cannot conquer loneliness but at least we r proud of ourselves, not to b stupid, dumb n silly becoz of love.

As for my sis, no nid to feel sad, coz maybe YK hv to go thru it then she will wake up one day. All u can do as a fren, is to lend ur ears n shoulders n gv her good advice.

Lastly, a big thx to my colleague who really helped greatly in consoling me, n give me his point of view as a guy, n lend me ears everytime i feel down.

To all in love, treasure each other. To those still finding love, fret not coz love will come knocking soon!!

Hair revamp

After dyeing my hair black (DIY type) about 2 weeks plus back, I decided to go and highlight my hair today since I am officially on MC (not really sick, but sick of work).

I chose 2 colours, one copper red and one copper brown and costs only $80. This hairdresser is not bad, quite reasonable priced and is only located 2 blocks away. My sil went b4 n tot not too bad so I decided to give it a try. Unfortunately, the colour did not come out well. Not coz the skill is not good but my hair. I din expect my black hair will hinder the development of the new colours, so din actually mention to the hairdresser. So when she realised and asked me about it during the wash after dye, its too late. I will have to make another trip down again probably in a mth's or two's time (wash away the black dye, do a base colour and do highlights - ard $150). Nevertheless there is still some added shades to brighten up my dull black hair which is of no help at all when I take pics.

One lesson learnt - so if anyone went for any black colouring in future, pls rem to tell e hairdresser so she could wash away the dye 1st else new colours cannot rest on ur tresses..

My Favorite "Cheer me up" Picture...

I came across this picture sometime in 2003. Find it extremely hilarious, cute and sad. What could be worse than having a bad hair day and everything else is not on the good side. Everytime when I feel sad or down, I would look at this picture, and managed to cheer up abit...

Starting a blog..

I am always fast in starting up something (like Neopets, Friendster, Blogs etc) through influence from friends or someone just told me to try. However, I am always slow in maintaining them. Like Neopets, I started seriously "playing" them only a year after I have registered and in Friendster, I did nothing than set up my profile, update pictures, add friends and kpo-ing friends' profiles.

I started this blog (or rather registered it sometime in Jun 2005. I cannot bring myself to start writing anything coz I simply have no inspiration. I only started posting meaningful n not so meaningful articles, personality tests and some inetersting pictures since I started. My 1st sort-of official blog came on 14 Feb 06, Valentine's Day when I has such a wonderful time and suddenly feel like writing them down.

Well, after that, this should be one of the 1st blog I started WRITING!! Ok, its like 1am+ now and I am starting to feel tired. Let's continue again..SOON i hope.

My Valentine's Day - 14 Feb 06

Beautiful flowers from Web (dunno y happened to be same design as last year's! Web said he din know what he ordered before n this year...hahaha, funny guy!)

Another bouquet of pretty flowers from Xris and Angeline (Xris had a hard time finding this bouquet for me, just as much as I sourced for hers!)

We went to Paulaner Bräuhaus at Millenia Walk. Web gave me a surprise by bringing me to walk ard Millenia Walk before going there. First time there and its really a nice place! Passed by many times but never had chance to go there. Thanks Web for bringing me to such a nice place! Will be back soon!!

Very nice decor inside with a ship-like section and spacious dining area. Din manage to take more pics coz paisay la....

The blur look on his face when we just settled down and placed our order.

The Special Valentine Set:

Me, caught suddenly by the cam, however looking happy..

Had bread and appetizer (very nice salad except for the mushroom which I happily contributed to Web) but 4got to take pic (coz too hungry!!), then came the salmon and dunno wat soup...yummy!!

Our main course...really very nice! Completely surprised by the portion. Din look at the menu carefully coz only 2 main courses choices so just took the fish (other one is beef which we both dun take).

Lastly, the dessert...completely tempting!!!

We also had beer (really smooth and nice) and champagne (yucks, think I dunno how to appreciate champagne) with the meal...and its been a really GREAT time!!